Emotional Intelligence: The Skill That Sets You Apart
- Fenx Nette
- Jun 15
- 3 min read
How to Improve Emotional Intelligence at Work and in Leadership Roles
In today's fast-moving professional world, technical skills may help you get the job—but emotional intelligence (EQ) is what helps you keep it, grow in it, and thrive beyond it.
We’re constantly told to earn more certifications, chase more metrics, and develop new strategies. But the top 1% know something different: emotional intelligence is a leadership superpower.
🌱 What Is Emotional Intelligence?
Emotional intelligence is the ability to recognize, manage, and influence your emotions—and understand the emotions of others. Psychologist Daniel Goleman (1995) identified five core elements of EQ:
Self-awareness
Self-regulation
Motivation
Empathy
Social skills
These aren’t "nice-to-have" qualities. They’re mission-critical—especially in leadership, teamwork, and client relationships.
🔑 5 Ways to Improve Emotional Intelligence
1. Cultivate Self-Awareness Through Daily Check-Ins
Spend a few minutes each day asking yourself: "What am I feeling, and why?"
By noticing your emotional patterns, you’ll gain clarity before your emotions gain control.📝 Try journaling or using a mood-tracking app to stay grounded.
“Self-awareness is the cornerstone of emotional intelligence.” — Goleman (1995)
2. Respond, Don’t React
When tensions rise, pause before you speak. Count to five. Take a breath. Step back from the urge to defend or lash out.
This pause allows your rational brain to step in, and shows emotional maturity in action.
3. Practice Empathy with Active Listening
Listening isn't just hearing—it's presence. Listen to understand, not to fix or judge. Ask questions like: "What do you need right now?” or “That sounds tough—want to talk about it?”
Empathy creates psychological safety and deepens professional trust.
4. Ask for Feedback—and Welcome It
Emotionally intelligent leaders don't fear feedback. They invite it. Seek it from people who see you in action: "How do I show up under pressure? ”Do I make others feel heard?”
Use that feedback to fine-tune your communication, leadership, and energy.
5. Make Others Feel Seen and Valued
Whether you’re in a leadership role or just starting out—remember the human.
Take note of wins, birthdays, life updates, or challenges people are facing. Send messages. Give recognition. Small gestures become unforgettable.
“People may forget what you said—but they never forget how you made them feel.” — Maya Angelou
💼 Why Emotional Intelligence Matters at Work
According to Bradberry and Greaves (2009), 90% of top performers have high EQ. The higher your emotional intelligence, the more likely you are to be resilient, collaborative, and successful.
Especially in remote and hybrid work environments, reading the emotional energy of a team or situation is crucial to managing conflict, inspiring others, and leading through uncertainty.
✨ Final Thought
Emotional intelligence isn’t something you’re just born with—it’s something you build. And when you invest in EQ, you’re not only becoming a better leader—you’re becoming a better communicator, partner, and decision-maker.
So the next time you’re tempted to focus solely on hard skills, remember:
EQ is the one skill that can’t be outsourced or automated. It’s your edge—and it’s always worth strengthening.
References (APA Style)
Bradberry, T., & Greaves, J. (2009). Emotional Intelligence 2.0. TalentSmart. Goleman, D. (1995). Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ. Bantam Books. Goleman, D. (2006). Social Intelligence: The New Science of Human Relationships. Bantam Books.
Written by Jeannette Bryan aka @fenxnette Visionary Entrepreneur | Human-Centered Leader
🔗 Connect with me on LinkedIn🌐 Visit: www.FNMXcentral.com
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